Tough Life Changing Decision

For the longest time I couldn’t fully understand why women who had to remove their breasts would feel “less of a woman”.

Many were very self conscious and some even depressed..

I have always felt that body parts don’t and shouldn’t define a person or gender. How naive I was...

Because after ytd’s gynae appt, i think I can now feel just that little tip of the iceberg of that emotional and mental turmoil those ladies felt.

Ligation— tts one of the many things on my mind since ytd..

Hahah.. nothing super life threatening but it’ll definitely be life changing!

While my intellectual mind knows that it’s the right move to take for many reasons, there’s that weird bugging feeling deep inside that feels that it’s just wrong.

Like it’s not natural u know... im like consenting to destroy part of a perfectly functioning reproductive system that God has blessed me with!

(Something that some women may be praying very hard for......) and here I am, deciding to cut mine.

But like I said, with didi’s arrival soon, I’m more than content and blessed to have 3 children..

It’ll be financially difficult to manage another one but yet sometimes the human heart/mind is fickle.............

What if.........

It’s all those “what ifs” that will probably haunt me when it’s done and over with.

Maybe it’s because of that word “permanent” that makes it so much more difficult to just say “ok let’s do it!”

Like........... maybe................ we could afford a fourth? 🤣

After all these first 2 look soooo cute!