Failed expectations

Sometimes i dun understand why i get myself sooooo worked up over what u said or how u reacted to somethings... And then i realise it's because what u say matters to me. I treasure your comments,be it good or bad.. So then i try to see things from your point of view.. Sometimes i get it..Sometimes i just don't.

Today, i dont..

Im getting sick n tired of living up to your 'expectations'. I know im not answerable to you for any of my actions. But somehow your approval matters to me. Could be because we've been friends for so long n i treasure the friendship we have. But perhaps to you, it's all a different matter now.

Im frustrated how u think too deeply into any of my actions. Drink coffee u aso got something to say..what game i play aso something to say...u know how tiring it is trying to do things when everything i do seems to be judged by you?

Maybe im thinking too much. I know u're just watching my back for some things i do. And i really appreciate it.. Thats why i even take what you say seriously. Perhaps too seriously at times that your unhappiness or 'black face' affects me more than u know..

Im just very tired of the ways things are right now..just gonna give u your space n hope things turn for the better.. Lesser contact lesser conflicts i guess... oh well..